The purpose of this post is to give you a picture of my life as a wife. While the principle of honoring your husband is universal, the ways I honor my husband may be different than the ways you should honor your husband. Every man is different and every marriage is different. Rather than compare and try to keep up with one another, let’s just seek the Lord’s wisdom in all things.
Thank you so much for clicking on this post and reading about 7 Ways I Choose to Honor my Husband. Today I’m going to really dive into some specific ways I try to show respect and honor to my favorite man, my husband. I know in today’s culture the idea of showing respect to one’s husband has become distorted. And that’s an unfortunate thing, because God created men with a deep desire to feel respected. They desire respect just as much as we as women desire love. If you’re new to this concept a great book I’d suggest is Love and Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs. With that said, today’s post is not about why I choose to respect my husband and show honor to him, it’s about how I do that.
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7 Ways I Choose to Honor my Husband
I want to put emphasis on one word in the title of this post. Choose. I CHOOSE to honor my husband. It’s not based on my moods, feelings, agenda, or even my husband’s behavior. It’s a choice that I have to choose every single day. To be honest with you all, I am a very stubborn headstrong woman. Respecting my husband does not always come naturally to me. I want to do things my way and that’s that. Maybe you’re like that too. Let me save you a lot of grieve and tell you, that stubborn selfish attitude won’t get you far. Thankfully, with God’s grace and guidance I am learning to become less selfish and more loving and respectful.
If you are like me and struggle with a stubborn selfish heart I HIGHLY suggest reading April Cassidy’s book or blog posts on her site The Peaceful Wife. She’ll show you how much peace you can find in honoring your husband and respecting him as you are suppose to. Even the days I’m grumpy or mad at him turn out so much better when I push through my mood and honor my man. It puts a smile on my face to put a smile on his face. Even better, when I honor my husband, he’s more loving and sweet to me. It’s a win-win ladies!
1. Cooking his Meals
Obviously, I love to cook so it’s no surprise I’m the primary cook in our family. Over time I also got in the habit of making my husband breakfast and lunch on his work days. It brings so much joy to him and makes his work week easier. It also gives me a fun opportunity to leave happy notes on his lunchbox.
2. Greeting him After Work
This is a new habit we have started and I absolutely love it. With my husband’s new job I’m generally home when he gets home from work. No matter what I’m doing, when I hear him pull up I pop up and greet him at the door. We then melt into each other’s arms and hug for a solid minute. It is such a happy way to start our evenings together. It also shows Trevor that he is more important than any chore, blog post, or anything else I was working on.
3. Giving him Space
Giving my husband space might sound counterintuitive for a list like this. However, Trevor wants and craves space. Early on in our marriage this one was hard for me. Heck, sometimes it is still hard for me. I am the definition of an extrovert and he is the definition of an introvert. I crave social interaction and he craves alone time. I use to try and force him to be with me whenever I needed social time. I’m thankful that God opened my eyes to how selfish that is. Who am I to force my husband to give up his much needed alone time? Now I try to respect his need for space and if I need social time in those moments I can always call a friend, stop over at my parent’s house, or even spend time in prayer with the Lord. Even better, when I do respect his need for space the time we do spend together is filled with much more love and joy.
4. Letting him Lead
I fully believe that my husband is suppose to be the head of our household. Our God is a God of order. He created order in the family by setting the husband as the leader. There can only be one captain of a ship folks, otherwise there would be constant turmoil and chaos. Letting my husband lead does not mean I don’t have opinions. Oh trust me, I do have LOTS of opinions. And because my husband loves me he often tries to make decisions with my opinions and desires in mind. However, there are times when we disagree strongly and can not find any middle ground. That’s when I have to step back and let him lead. He gets the final say. If I’m being completely honest, when I do step back and let my husband lead there’s so much more peace. I don’t have to worry about everything because I know he has it under control. I can let go and leave that issue to him and the Lord. It’s in the moments that I try to take over that I feel stressed and overwhelmed. That’s why letting him lead is a way to honor him and his rightful place as head of the house. It’s also a way to find peace in my own heart.
5. Dressing Appropriately
Dressing appropriately is something I generally do anyway. I’m a pretty modest simple dresser. However I do like to get my husband’s opinions on my clothes and honor what he thinks. I know for some women, the thought any man telling you what to wear makes you cringe. Can I tell you the truth though? There is nothing more loving than when my husband cares about my outfit. Occasionally I will put on something that’s a bit skimpy and I’ll ask him, “is this to revealing?”. If he says, “yes take it off”, I do. Now and then he will tell me something is too skimpy even when I don’t ask. When my husband says that, it doesn’t make me feel controlled. It makes me feel like I have a man that wants to protect me and keep me safe. He doesn’t want other guys looking at me in inappropriate ways. He’s protecting me as fine china as God instructed him to do. I have a husband that wants my body all to himself and ladies that’s the way it should be. Why wouldn’t I want to honor my husband in this way? I don’t need to wear skimpy outfits and get looks from other men just to feel good about myself. I know I have a husband who thinks I’m the most beautiful woman in the world and that’s all I need.
6. Keeping Safe Boundaries from Other Men
Since I’ve been married I have honored my husband by keeping safe boundaries from other men. I don’t need to have best guy friends. My husband is my best guy friend. I don’t need to be alone with other men. I don’t need to have ongoing texting relationships with other men. I don’t need to talk about my problems at length with other men and have other men confiding in me. Don’t get me wrong, I do have guys I’d consider my friends. Trevor has lots of friends I would consider my friends also. Occasionally they might even want my advice as a woman. However, there is no need for me to be alone with them. There is no need for me to be the one to text them. I can see them with Trevor around and that’s that. I know that it is too easy to sin and I don’t need to have any relationships that could turn inappropriate. It’s not worth it to me and it does not honor my husband. My husband is the only man I need to be close with emotionally and physically. I want him to know that always.
7. Saying Thank You
Maybe this is an obvious nice thing to do, but I’m so bad at it. I don’t know why, but I’m just not very verbal with appreciation. Yes I appreciate things but I often forget to say it. Trevor made me aware of this when we were dating and I immediately felt awful. Ever since he pointed out my lack of saying thank you I have tried to honor him by saying it. Since I learned Trevor values a verbal thank you I have tried to find different things to thang him for regularly. For example, out of the blue I might just tell him how much I’m thankful for him working hard at his job to provide for us. It’s truly how I feel and I want to honor him by verbalizing it.
Thank you so much for reading through this list of 7 Ways I Choose to Honor my Husband. Obviously, this post is only one side of our marriage. It doesn’t mention all the ways my sweet husband shows love to me. He is sweet, patient, giving, and encouraging. But I do want to mention once again, I always have to choose to honor and respect my husband. There are days he’s not so good at being loving and on those days I still (try) to choose to honor him. Ladies, we can only control our side of the fence. Rather than nagging your husband to change I urge you to focus on you. Focus on your side of the fence because you are the only person you can control in your marriage. If your husband is struggling with loving you, leave it in God’s hands and just focus on what you can do to Honor your husband.
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